On the edge

Lately, I feel like I'm on the edge of something... the problem is I don't know exactly WHAT I'm on the edge of. And I'm not sure if it's good or bad. I feel like it's good... I keep wanting to call friends and talk and I feel like I have excitings stories to tell and news to report... but I don't actually HAVE anything new to tell. Is that strange? I have been feeling anxious lately and maybe that's part of it. I don't know what I can blame on my thyroid condition and what's just... "normal Anya crap". I keeping reading about all these people with thyroid issues that have major mood-swings, so maybe that's what's going on. *sigh* I can't believe it's been 6 months since my surgery. Apparently, I'm "normalized" now with my meds, which is a good thing. But then why don't I feel normal? Granted, it's hard to know what's normal at this point. Can you believe it's MID-NOVEMBER already??!

Did you know that the Thyroid is shaped like a butterfly?

All I have left is the left wing. The right wing is gone. Now isn't that ironic...

rants and votes

Okay, I realize I'm new to blogging, but why why why is Blogger not uploading my photos!!?? I keep getting an error message with no explanation as to WHY.... *sigh*

I voted this morning, though I almost didn't. I drove to the elementary school polling place and drove in slow circles around the parking lot (probably creeping out the teachers inside) to try to determine the voting entrance. There are 3 building and about 9 different entrances. I almost gave up and then I saw tiny little 8 inch flags stuck in the ground along one of the entrances. I followed the flags and did my patriotic duty. They expect turnout in Ohio to be around 47%. That actually seems high to me, for a non-presidential election. How sad is it that 47% in "THE" democracy of the world is considered a great turnout? Did YOU vote today??

Goodbye Roxy

After determining her days were filled with more pain than joy, my brother and his family decided to put Roxy down this morning. I know it was the right thing to do, and she's in doggy heaven now, romping with all the pets we've all loved over the years. You know, there was a moment this morning when I was leaving the house and I kissed my own dog and said "goodbye Roxy"... maybe that was the moment she left us.
I will miss her terribly.

Roxane "Roxy" Weisbrod

Remembering November 4, 2004

I don't think I really want to get into politics on my Blog, but I cannot let today go by without "mourning" this day last year. A year ago today I stood patiently in line for FOUR AND A HALF HOURS waiting to cast my vote in the presidential election. Here in Ohio, some people stood in line for NINE hours, with children, skipping their jobs, missing meals... Some people couldn't wait that long, couldn't miss their jobs and lose their daily paychecks, and their votes could never even be cast.

Columbus, Ohio 11/4/04

It was just days after I had suffered a terrible bout with food poisoning that landed me in the emergency room. I was weak and shaky, but I stood there for those four hours with so much HOPE in my heart... I stood there among all these other people that had the same sparks of hope in their eyes... that we were helping to change the world. That we would be preventing what would surely be a disaster.

I'm still in shock over it all. I'm still disappointed that it all came down to Ohio. I'm disappointed that there weren't more investigations into voter fraud and discrimination that DID happen here in Ohio and other states. My heart sank on November 5 and still hasn't recovered, especially since now we've seen just how far we've sunk in the past year.

But I can't help but still be hopeful that someday we'll pull ourselves back out of these messes. It's almost painful to imagine how very different things would be right now had the election ended differently. And it's scary to think how much worse things might get in the next three years. Here's hoping our fears do not become a reality. Here's hoping sanity and humanity win out...

I feel like I should be wearing a black armband today. *sigh*

My aching heart...

Ugghhhhh.... I just found out late last night that my brother's beautiful
black lab, Roxy, is very sick and will probably not make it more than a
few more weeks. She's lived 10 wonderful years, and yet it's gone by so
fast and my heart is just aching for her. I wish I could say goodbye and
give her kisses... she always knew me right away and would be so so
so soooo sad when she knew I was leaving again. She loves to play
with my socks and I'd always find them scattered around their house.
Roxy also likes pulling socks off a person's feet and I was always
amazed how she would pull them off BABIES (my neice and nephews)
sooooooo gently.... Such a sweet, wonderful, loyal dog. I hope she
goes peacefully... I hope she feels my love. Damn it, why is it that
sometimes animals seem to mean more to us than people?? And after
all the crying I did last night, how is it possible that more tears are
coming now?? I guess I should go drink some water...

I love you, Roxy!!

See more photos of Roxy, from 1996 through 2004 at:

http://www.kodakgallery.com/I.jsp?c=wk1y5pv.5agmr4xb&x=0&y=c5kjit

Happy Halloween!

Happy birthday to both Lucy T. and Evan R. ! ! !

We tried to get in the spirit this year and even carved our own pumpkin at our neighbor's Pumpkin Carving Party! HAPPY HALLOWEEN !!!!!!!

Sammi will greet the Trick-or-Treaters

The Beaupre Pumpkin '05!The Carving Party Collection

Why Blog?

Quote:

"It's not a bad idea to get in the habit of writing down one's thoughts.

It saves one having to bother anyone else with them."

-- Isabel Colegate

Unless, of course, you have a blog.

And then everything you write makes you wonder if you're filled with too much self-importance because of course you ARE bothering others with your random thoughts. Or maybe you're just too lazy to write with a pen in an actual journal (that seems to be my reason since I've got a box full of diaries going back to 1979 that barely make it past February 1st). I've been practicing with my blog for a few months now, without showing it to anyone. Now I think I'm ready to go public, but I'm in a quandry regarding what to write about. I'm self-conscious and I feel like it should be "important" or "insightful". On the other hand, I'm not looking for a Pulitzer Prize, I'm just journaling, right? Please be patient with me as I find my blog voice.

Miss Limpy's Mom

Okay, so I really shouldn't make fun of Sammi for injuring herself in the yard. Today, while raking leaves, I twisted my ankle and crumpled to the ground under our Oak tree. It's a little sore, but I'm fine. *sigh* My right ankle likes to just fall out from under me.... this has happened on numerous occasions, on various surfaces (totally flat concrete, bumpy grass, top of the staircase), and in several different countries. *sigh*

Renoir's Women

My parents were visiting us last week and my Mom and I spent a wonderful afternoon enjoying "Renoir's Women" currently at the Columbus Museum of Art. If you have a chance to see this unique exhibition, I highly recommend it. Pierre-Auguste Renoir has long been my favorite artist -- I feel a deep emotional connection to the people in his portraits. It's a magical combination of impressionist subtleties and piercing reality in the eyes.

This portrait of Madame Henriot is one of my favorites -- not as much because of what's on the surface, but for the story behind it. In reality, Madame Henriot, an actress and Renoir's lover, was not beautiful. She was plain, hairy, and a little husky. But her portraits portray such incredible beauty and peace -- because that's how Renoir saw her soul. I think we all hope to be portrayed with a little soft-focus and love.

Renoir's "Madame Henriot"

"We see the world not as it is, but as we are" -- Anais Nin

Backyard dangers

Little Sammi likes to run into the "woods" near our neighbors yard and fantasize about catching rabbits and squirrels. Well, she came back inside today limping and bleeding from her toe... We couldn't really tell how serious it was, so within 10 minutes we were in the vet's office. She was SUCH a good girl, letting us carry her and holding her in the car. The vet's office was very busy on this Saturday morning, so she was anxious about all the people and other dogs around. Ultimately, she's fine... she snagged her nail on something (trying to climb a tree maybe?) and nearly pulled it out. Ouch! She's on antibiotics and pain meds, and we're giving her all kinds of special attention. Of course, we'll be calling her "Miss Limpy" for at least a week...